Ouch! That Stings! Why Rejection Hurts So Much (And How to Deal With It)

We tend to think of genius as something you’re born with — a rare trait possessed by the Einsteins and Teslas of the world. But what if many of the abilities we associate with genius — a great memory, quick problem-solving, mental math, creative insight — are actually trainable skills? My guest today says that’s exactly the case. His name is Nelson Dellis, and he's a six-time USA Memory Champion and the author of the book Everyday Genius. In our conversation, Nelson explains why memory is the foundation of thinking well and why having information stored in your head still matters in the age of ChatGPT. He shares a practical technique for improving your memory, how to read with greater focus and retention, and how to study to actually make information stick. We then talk about the importance of developing “number sense” and how to convert imperial measurements to metric in your head, strategies for solving problems more effectively, and even how to gain an edge in the games of Monopoly and Connect Four. At the end of the conversation, we get into more esoteric territory, including intuition, dreams, and the idea of remote viewing. Resources Related to the PodcastNelson's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #546 — How to Get a Memory Like a Steel TrapAoM Article: 10 Ways to Improve Your MemoryAoM Article: How to Speed Read Like Theodore RooseveltAoM Podcast #385: Learning How to LearnAoM Article: Study Tactics of the Successful Gentleman ScholarThe CIA's remote viewing program Connect With Nelson DellisNelson's websiteNelson on YouTube Thanks to This Week’s Podcast Sponsor Incogni. Take your personal data back with Incogni! Use code MANLINESS at the link below and get 60% off an annual plan: https://incogni.com/manliness See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Cold exposure has gotten a lot of attention the past few years, with people dunking themselves in ice baths for the sake of their health and well-being. But, good news here, exposing yourself to heat by sitting in the sauna or even a hot tub, might actually be even better for you, not to mention more pleasant. In his new book, Hotwired: How the Hidden Power of Heat Makes Us Stronger, Bill Gifford unpacks the dichotomy of heat: how it can be both a danger and a healer. In the first part of our conversation, we dive into that former side, discussing what happens when your core temperature gets too high, why some people handle the stress of hot temperatures better than others, and how heat tolerance can actually be trained. We then talk about the advantages of heat exposure over cold exposure, and the benefits of heat for both body and mind, including how it can boost athletic performance and heart health, and may even be an effective treatment for depression. We also talk about how to get the most out of your sauna sessions and how Bill and I like to sauna. Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Article: How to Sauna — All the FAQsAoM Article: How Saunas Can Help Save Your Body, Mind, and SpiritAoM Podcast #585: Inflammation, Saunas, and the New Science of DepressionAoM Podcast #724: The Strange Science of SweatStudy reviewing the health benefits of "sauna bathing"Hotter'n Hell Hundred bike raceConnect with Bill GiffordBill on IGBill on X Thanks to This Week’s Podcast Sponsor Incogni. Take your personal data back with Incogni! Use code MANLINESS at the link below and get 60% off an annual plan: https://incogni.com/manliness See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When we fail to make desired progress in life, most of us put the blame on physical and environmental limits. But my guest says that what's really holding people back is what's in their heads. Nir Eyal is the author of Beyond Belief: The Science-Backed Way to Stop Limiting Yourself and Achieve Breakthrough Results. Today on the show, he argues that much of how we think about ourselves, our abilities, and what’s possible becomes our reality, and that getting what we want in life often comes down to changing how we perceive it. Drawing on research in neuroscience and psychology, Nir shares the three powers of belief, and how they direct your attention, alter your expectations, shape your sense of agency, and determine whether you stick with hard things long enough to see results. Along the way, he shares ways to identify and challenge the limiting beliefs that can sabotage your goals and relationships. Resources Related to the PodcastNir's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #553 — How to Become IndistractableAoM Article: How Reframing Builds ResilienceAoM podcast episode on William James and pragmatismConnect with Nir EyalNir's website Thanks to This Week’s Podcast Sponsor Incogni. Take your personal data back with Incogni! Use code MANLINESS at the link below and get 60% off an annual plan: https://incogni.com/manliness See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When it comes to building a happy and meaningful life, most of us rely on a grab bag of strategies — habits and goals around work, relationships, and health. But my guest today would argue that in the quest for true flourishing, there’s a deeper element that not only ties together those efforts, but organizes and energizes them: purpose. Vic Strecher is a professor of public health, a behavioral scientist, and the author of Life on Purpose: How Living for What Matters Most Changes Everything. We begin our conversation with Vic's powerful story of how losing his 19-year-old daughter led him to discover how purpose can fundamentally reshape your life. Vic then unpacks the dramatic impact purpose has on your physical and mental health. He shares some guideposts on finding your own purpose, what kinds of aims foster the most fulfillment, why finding purpose isn't a one-and-done process, and why becoming purposeful can make life feel less like a tug-of-war and more like stepping into a strong current that carries you forward. Resources Related to the PodcastThe Purposeful appAoM Article:The Power of PurposeThe 5 Best AoM Podcast Episodes on Finding Meaning and PurposeAoM Podcast #1,051: Man’s Search for Meaning, With Viktor Frankl’s GrandsonConnect with Vic StrecherVic's faculty pageVic on LinkedIn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you're looking for a way to improve your fitness, boost your mental health, and reconnect with a deeply human activity — all without going to the gym or pounding your knees on a daily run — then rucking may be the practice you've been looking for. Rucking is simple: throw some weight on your back and start walking. But a little context and a few key tips can make it a safer, more effective, and more satisfying experience. Here to unpack those principles and practicals is Michael Easter, author of Walk With Weight: The Definitive Guide to Rucking. Michael and I first explore the evolutionary and military history of carrying load. We then dive into why rucking is perhaps the most accessible form of training for strength and stamina, and such an effective tool for alleviating back pain, building bone health, and fostering fat loss. We get into using a backpack versus a weighted vest, how much weight you should carry, and how you can get started today with stuff you've probably already got lying around. Resources Related to the PodcastMichael's previous appearances on the AoM podcast: Episode #708: Overcome the Comfort CrisisEpisode #930: Break Your Bad Habits by Escaping the Scarcity LoopThe Comfort Crisis by Michael EasterAoM Article: Cardio for the Man Who Hates Cardio — The Benefits of RuckingAoM podcast interview with the founder of GoRuckAoM Podcast #682: Get RuckingAoM Article: Don’t Just Lift Heavy, Carry HeavyAoM Article: How to Take Care of Feet on a Hike or RuckAoM Article: One Weird Trick for Busting Through a Weight-Loss PlateauAoM Article: The Benefits of Hanging for Strength and MobilityAoM Article: Lessons From the Roman Art of WarGoRuckConnect with Michael EasterMichael's Substack: Two PercentThanks to This Week’s Podcast Sponsor Incogni. Take your personal data back with Incogni! Use code MANLINESS at the link below and get 60% off an annual plan: https://incogni.com/manliness See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.