John Legend: Beyond the Headlines of Miscarriage, Kanye West Fallout & the Hidden Cost of Stardom (E354)

This new Essential Habits series breaks down the key habits behind high performance, one episode at a time. This week’s habit is deceptively simple: asking better questions. Philosopher Alain de Botton joins us to explore how a single, uncomfortable question, “How have I annoyed you?” can deepen trust, defuse tension, and create stronger connections in every part of life. Whether it’s at home, at work, or with close friends, we often avoid the conversations that would help us grow. Alain shows us a different way, one built on emotional generosity, honest listening, and the courage to be vulnerable. In this episode, we explore: Why awkward questions build trustHow to listen without getting defensiveThe science behind emotional connectionWhat high-performing teams can learn from philosophyThe hidden power of backstories and being 'truly heard' Here is a list of studies referenced in the episode: The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness. Arthur Aron, Elaine Aron (1997)Understanding the conversation gap: Why employees aren’t talking, and what we can do about it (Braverly), referenced in How to Navigate Difficult Conversations with Employees. Harvard Negotiation Project Rejection Really Hurts, published in Science (Oct 2003). University Of California - Los AngelesDaring Greatly by Brené Brown Listen to the full episode with Alain De Botton here: https://pod.fo/e/1f5db0

The voice in your head can either push you forward or hold you back. In this episode, Jake and Damian delve into the powerful impact of self-talk on performance, mindset, and emotional well-being. They explore how the inner dialogue we carry can shape our identity, build resilience, or quietly sabotage our efforts, depending on how we manage it. Revisiting insightful conversations with guests like Denise Lewis, Dr. Steve Peters, Pippa Grange, Aldo Kane, and Tom Daley, Jake and Damian highlight how elite performers consciously train their inner voice just as much as their bodies and they share practical tools for turning your inner critic into a trusted coach. Listen in as they unpack the science and stories behind mastering self-talk, revealing how understanding the voice in your head can be the difference between breaking down or breaking through. Listen to the episodes mentioned: Denise Lewis: https://pod.fo/e/2c05ac Steve Peters: https://pod.fo/e/298713 Pippa Grange: https://pod.fo/e/10bc10 Aldo Kane: https://pod.fo/e/2885c1 Tom Daley: https://pod.fo/e/1760c

Sometimes, the most radical thing a leader can do is trust. That’s what struck me in my conversation with James Timpson, not just the results he’s achieved, but the mindset behind them. James runs a business where people matter more than policies, and where the golden rules aren’t about performance metrics, they’re about showing up, looking the part, and doing the right thing. In this episode, I dig into the psychology behind what makes James’s approach so powerful, from the science of capitalisation to how active, constructive responses can build trust, loyalty, and even generosity. When you lead with belief in people, you don’t just change behaviour, you transform lives. If you’ve ever wondered whether kindness can scale, or if culture really can be your competitive edge, this one might just shift your thinking. Here is a list of studies referenced in the episode: What Do You Do When Things Go Right? The Intrapersonal and Interpersonal Benefits of Sharing Positive Events - Authors: Shelly Gable, Harry Reis, Emily Impett, Evan AsherWill You Be There for Me When Things Go Right? Supportive Responses to Positive Event Disclosures - Authors: Shelly Gable, Gian Gonzaga, Ashley StrachmanAre You Happy for Me? How Sharing Positive Events With OthersProvides Personal and Interpersonal Benefits - Authors: Harry Reis, Shannon Smith, Cheryl Carmichael, Peter Caprariello Listen to the full episode with James Timpson here: https://pod.fo/e/c4dbd

Callum Wilson is a Premier League striker known for his sharp finishing and explosive pace on the pitch; but off it, he has an equally powerful story.  Warning: this episode contains themes of suicide and trauma. In this episode, Callum opens up about the darker side of his upbringing, including dealing with suicidal thoughts as a teen and the emotional scars that came with growing up in chaos. He reflects on how football gave him a sense of direction and purpose when everything else felt unstable. He also shares the impact of Eddie Howe, who became a father figure, and how therapy helped him face long-buried trauma. From two ACL injuries to mentoring younger players, Callum reflects on resilience, growth, and staying grounded. This episode dives into mental health, fatherhood, football, and the power of second chances. If you, or someone you know who's struggling - please call Samaritans on 116123 or CALM on 0800 58 58 58. 🚨 Partners Heights 👉 Get 20% off your subscription by using Code: HP20 here: https://hppod.co/20heights HP Foundation 👉Do you want to kick-start an evolution that will change the lives of millions of children? Find out more about the High Performance Foundation: https://hppod.co/foundation HP Corporate Events 👉Click here to book High Performance Events: https://hppod.co/corporate-events Explore offers and discounts through our other partners: https://hppod.co/partners

Today Jake and Damian break down why your habits matter more than you think. Did you know 43% of what you do each day is habit, not conscious choice? That means nearly half your day is lived on autopilot. So where is your autopilot taking you? This episode breaks down: Why tiny daily actions shape your entire identityHow Sam Tomkins, James Clear, and Jo Malone use micro habits to stay sharpHow to journal proof of your progressThe 3 questions to ask yourself before any taskAnd why folding your clothes well might just change your life Damian and Jake dig into practical, science-backed tools you can use today to start living more intentionally—and performing at your best without burning out. Plus: The start of Damian’s new series on Essential Habits drops Wednesdays in the feed. Make sure you’re subscribed so you don’t miss out. Listen to the full length episodes referenced in this podcast: Sam Tomkins: https://pod.fo/e/14cdef Jo Malone: https://pod.fo/e/bbdc9 James Clear: https://pod.fo/e/16868c