Raising Kids Who Persist Through Struggles
28 May 2024 - 30 minsWe all want our kids to proceed through life with confidence as they develop physically, mentally, and emotionally. Because we care so much, it can be difficult for us to watch them struggle when faced with a challenge or a new skill. It's especially tough to see them becoming so frustrated that they give up or refuse to even try in the first place, even when we've done all we can to encourage them.
In this episode, Janet shares a helpful reframe and actionable guidelines for fostering our kids' healthy persistence, and then responds to some specific situations parents recently shared with her: a child getting too frustrated when attempting anything challenging; a 3-year-old who refuses to...
How to Truly Connect When You Correct
A mother has questions about her three-year-old son's impulsive, dysregulated behavior and the differences in the way she and her husband are handling it. She handles these moments calmly and gently, while her husband tends to be firmer, requires the child to correct his actions, and uses language like "don't be destructive." She’s concerned that his response crosses a line from setting healthy limits into causing shame. He feels their son is more likely to act out when she’s around and is more likely to listen and behave more calmly in his company. Janet offers her perspective on what both parents may be missing. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse.com and JanetLansbury.com. Please support our sponsors! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
25 mins
12 May Finished
How to Survive an Upset Child
When your child melts down, do you freeze, give in, or reach for a distraction trick? Janet explains why trying to stop the storm only makes it worse and how your own triggers and discomfort may be driving your response. She offers advice to help us hold boundaries, encourage our kids' resilience, and create lasting calm. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse.com and JanetLansbury.com. Please support our sponsors! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
32 mins
5 May Finished
We Can't Make Them Share
A parent describes a deceptively simple disagreement with her father about her 2.5-year-old son's unwillingness to share a bowl of blueberries. This mom doesn't believe a child will develop a generous spirit or other positive character traits by being coerced, but her father's more authoritarian view differs. Janet points out the nuances of the situation, which touch on big questions about sharing, boundaries, and raising kids who genuinely want to be kind. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse.com and JanetLansbury.com. Please support our sponsors! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
23 mins
28 April Finished
3 Reasons Your Toddler Rejects You for Their Other Parent
When a toddler plays favorites, it stings. One parent writes: "It feels as if I'm being rejected when I'm the one who's with her all day, putting so much energy into her care. It make me feel that I'm insufficient as a parent." Janet unpacks the surprising reasons behind parent preference —and the mindset that makes it stop. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse.com and JanetLansbury.com. Please support our sponsors! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
27 mins
21 April Finished
Setting Boundaries Without Power Struggles
A mother writes that she's been struggling with her 5-year-old daughter lately, who's been "provoking and testing boundaries on a new level." She has been especially harsh on her two-year old sibling, but when this mom and her partner step in, it inevitably leads to confrontation, tears, and hurtful words. Janet suggests an empathic approach—understanding the "why" behind this behavior -- and explains when, why, and how her approach to setting effective limits works. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse.com and JanetLansbury.com. Please support our sponsors! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
22 mins
14 April Finished
My Child Is So Mean to Me
A parent describes her 4-year-old daughter as smart, funny, incredibly strong-willed, but sometimes “downright mean.” While she appreciates her child’s spirit and doesn’t want to stifle that, when she says mean things to her she doesn’t feel it’s enough to simply acknowledge her daughter’s emotions and let slide her hurtful words and behavior. “I need her to find a better way to express that she is angry with me,” she writes. In this encore episode, Janet offers a perspective on the situation that she believes will help this mom better understand her daughter’s unconscious motives and intent, and ultimately ameliorate the behavior. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse.com and JanetLansbury.com. Please support our sponsors! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
27 mins
7 April Finished