Mailbag: Where are the statues going?

It's official: Alexander Isak has been labelled "a rat". But surely there needs to be a new animal for the Newcastle United fanbase? Pete, Luke and Jim Bernie Campbell are on the case... The lads discuss Spurs winning the first North London derby outside the UK (with thanks to Frontier Pets) and Man United's new hire, who fittingly seems to be an FBI agent from a screwball comedy. Meanwhile, Wayne Rooney begins hatching a plan to bring down High Performance's Tom Brady. Mr. Brady, you ever heard of Walkabout? **15% off Football Ramble Patreon annual subscriptions until the end of August!** Sign up for ad-free shows, bonus content every Wednesday and access to our Discord for $51 a year or $5 a month: https://www.patreon.com/footballramble. Find us on Bluesky, X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected]. ***Please take the time to rate us on your podcast app. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

**NEW Football Ramble Patreon offer! If you get an annual subscription before the end of August, you'll get 15% off - so that’s just over $50 for ad-free episodes, Discord access and bonus content across an entire Premier League season AND the 2026 World Cup!? Just head to patreon.com/footballramble to subscribe now!** Today's episode is a special teaser of what you can expect every week on the Football Ramble Patreon! On this week's agenda, it's Josh Brownhill's loving ode to Wayne Rooney, our experiences with Oasis tickets, and Luke's 'Buzz Rightyear' find on Temu. As a Patreon subscriber, you'll get access to this bonus Football Ramble episode released every Wednesday, plus ad-free episodes and a special invite to the Football Ramble Discord. And don't forget, if you get an annual subscription to the Football Ramble Patreon, you’ll get 15% off - so don't delay! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Man United have copied Newcastle’s homework and narrowed their striker options down to Ollie Watkins and Benjamin Šeško. That means Pete, Luke and Jim have to confront the terrifying prospect that they might actually have a decent season, as unlikely as that still sounds… We also get an update on the terrible situations at Sheffield Wednesday and Morecambe, while David Moyes becomes the unlikely head of the Everton tourist board and Joško Gvardiol’s pre-season training involves wielding a semi-automatic in the Croatian woods. Plus, Erik ten Hag remains adamant that Granit Xhaka won’t leave Bayer Leverkusen - cue the Benny Hill theme #herewego. Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows, extended Wednesday episodes, access to our Discord and early access to tickets and merch for just $5 per month: https://www.patreon.com/footballramble. ***Please take the time to rate us on your podcast app. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It’s a historic eeeeeaasaaay for Pete, Luke and Jim today after England retain their Euros crown with a clutch win over Spain. We revel in some era-defining performances from Sarina Wiegman, Chloe Kelly, Lucy Bronze and the rest of those effing heroes. Elsewhere, Arsenal finally complete the signing of Viktor Gyökeres, Pep turns down the India job (sort of) and Evangelos Marinakis convinces Morgan Gibbs-White to stay at Forest - presumably at gun point. Plus, rejoice: pre season tours are here! Shame nobody told the fans in the local area. For Upfront's full review of England's famous win, click here to listen and subscribe! Find us on Bluesky, X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected]. Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows, extended Wednesday episodes, access to our Discord and early access to tickets and merch for just $5 per month: https://www.patreon.com/footballramble. ***Please take the time to rate us on your podcast app. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Luke, Jim and David are here for a Friday frot! And while there might be no football, there are plenty of worried Geordies because Alexander Isak is being a hot mess – but fear not everyone, Alan Shearer is on the case... Elsewhere, in the loveliest of lovely old jobs, Jack Grealish has been linked with Napoli after someone drove him down the Amalfi Coast – it might be tenuous but we don't care. Plus, a listener tells us about Chelsea's team of magicians and there's the small matter of the Lionesses vs Spain on Sunday! For Upfront's full preview of that game on Saturday, click here to listen and subscribe! Find us on Bluesky, X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected]. Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows, extended Wednesday episodes, access to our Discord and early access to tickets and merch for just $5 per month: https://www.patreon.com/footballramble. ***Please take the time to rate us on your podcast app. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.